I Am.. Myself..

I sit here,
Engulfed by the shadows I once was.
I turn to run away,
Like a child running from a stranger.
I thought I knew myself,
But now I realize I am not the same.
I find myself confused,
Lost inside my own body.
I cannot decipher the code,
The code that tells me who I'm supposed to be.
I won't give up,
This time I want to know.
Who am I deep inside?
Am I really who I think I'm supposed to ge?

Am I pretending to be something that I'm not?
I look inside myself once more,
To find that this introspection was worthless.
I find nothing.
I am empty.
I am not what I wanted to be.

I sit here once again,
Scared of things I once adored.
Again I turn to run away,
But my legs won't carry me from here.
I thought I knew the right way out,
But I know I'm trying to get away form something that I am.
I've been trying to hard to save myself,
From something that I cannot be saved from.
I am what I am and I realize I can't change,
Maybe some day soon others will accept me,
Just like I've learned to accept myself.

Until then, I'll learn to be myself,
I'll keep everything the way it is.
I am not empty,
I'm just not all alive.
I may not be what I want, but I'm all I can be.